I have always been the epitome of Christmas spirit. Since my childhood, Christmas has always been my favorite season; we have had traditions that take us to all our different sides of the family, we got to see everyone...we used to do this really cool thing where we get a bunch of us together and provide an entire Christmas for a family in need (I mean extreme need)--the gifts, the tree, the food, everything. The only time we did not celebrate Christmas was when my brother was overseas (USAF) and even then...we just moved it to March.
I love the memories I have, but they get me stuck into certain traditions and the more those change the more BAH HUMBUG I get. I feel horrible about it because my world could be soooo much worse, but I cant help but miss those times. This year has been the most unenjoyable Christmas yet...nothing at work, no tree or decorations at home, not one stinkin Christmas party, no money for gifts, we have had 2 deaths in the family, my brother moved away to be a cop elsewhere, I dont get to visit all the places I usually do (which means I dont get to see everyone)...it just seems nothing is Christmasy this year. I have not even watched one Christmas special.
It may seem trivial but this has always been a highlight of my year and now its just...not. I don't like the feeling...someone gift me a shot of the holiday spirit quick! (Plus I am just now going shopping for the few gifts we can get and I am thinkin that an afternoon in the crazy, day-before-Christmas traffic will not help my negativity)
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